Back at our respective homes and...contemplating "F" words!

Dear Whoever is reading,

It is clear that the Squeaky Wheel tm Tour is over, however, I still have boxes, bags and suitcases all over the house to the contrary. Am I slow to clean it up because I want to relish every last moment or am I just lazy. Jeffrey put away everything in the kitchen. I asked him not to because I wanted to film all of the stuff that came off of the bus. It is hard to believe that all of this, plus everyone's equipment,luggage and personal effects were housed on that bus along with the 9 of us...but it and we were all there. 19 days for 5 of us and 21 days for 4 of us.

Dana was back at work all week making her clients beautiful. Her birthday was yesterday and she is now off on a wonderful cruise vacation. Jeffrey is still recovering, however, the doctor said (he did visit the doctor ordered by me and Tammy ; ) if he feels like doing something he should do it and if he doesn't...then, rest. He has compiled all the tapes for "FINDing Gina" and placed them in order of the tour, so he can begin putting the pilot together. Gary is back performing and catering in Dallas. We miss him when he is in Dallas. Eli, the youngest member of the crew with story ideas miles long is busy working on completing all the homework he has left due to missing 15 days of school. Annie, creative videographer and artist, is in Virginia spending time with her boyfriends family for the holidays. Cristi-the always happy lead videographer-is back with her family, working and recovering from her knee injury. It looks like she may not have to go into surgery...she simply needs to stay off of it...baby it..take it easy...what a concept! Difficult to do on the road...for sure. Tammy, my sister and tour manager is back at work, church and family...periodically waking up wondering why the bus is not moving, where we are supposed to be, when she has to wake us up and where is Jannel's cell phone? We even call her to ask her what we are supposed to be doing now that mother hen has left the bus. I am back at the computer in the cave (as Jeff calls it) contemplating what mess to clean up first. The one I left before tour or the ones made from the tour.

There was so much going on during the tour: meeting with the families of the missing, press meetings, filming, setting up for shows, money concerns, last minute booking, schedule, hotels, meals, daily struggling to find time and then hopefully logging on the Internet or phone to make sure other SWT artists, families of missing and event organizers were communicated with. I remember thinking I need to take every moment of this magical trip in tired or not and focus on having fun. Tammy and Dana seemed to have a real handle on finding the time to create fun when they bought dolls: Jenny and Tanisha and created a whole puppet video about it. I have to say I was slightly annoyed when they first started as I was too tired to appreciate the moment they were creating for themselves. I now have to say that they were an inspiration to me to have fun no matter what. Laughter and fun- the great release.

A couple of days ago, I heard Mike Myers of Austin Powers fame recall his father saying, "It's not that bad if you can laugh at it." His fathers sense of humor has been his inspiration. Simply putting together a tour to gain attention for missing people has a whole lot of sad. Going on that tour has a whole lot of sad and intense emotions. The reminder here is that I have learned to focus more each day on what I have FOUND and not what is missing. Some of that FOUND is very funny. Laughing takes us to the other side of crying creates health and lightens the load. Jeffrey has been around to teach me about laughter for a very long time. Jeffrey makes a joke out of everything. He is well crafted at it. I still have a lot of learning to gain from his approach. Tammy and Dana create their own fun. Something I so need to pay attn to. Annie just loves everybody no matter what and finds fun and happiness wherever she lands. It is what she focuses on. Joe is peace, tranquility, wisdom and had no problem enjoying every part of the tour. Eli found fun with his confessionals and stories he shared with everyone. Gary got into Tammy and Dana's fun by egging them on with props for Jenny and Tanisha...at one point I thought he was creating a monster, but it turned out to be beautiful one. Cristi created her comedy relief in trying to get a chance to drive the bus and going back and forth with Bama on film about the challenge. I don't remember doing anything particularly funny...but I enjoyed watching the others create their moments. My nature is to work, get things done and make things happen...but this tour reminded me once again to create, acknowledge and find time for laughter and fun no matter what the circumstances.

I would say we all have pain we can focus on if we want to. I know I do, but I don't wants to anymore? It doesn't make my life better and if something doesn't make my life better then what's the point?

Today I am choosing to focus on "F" words: FOUND and FUN!

I am off for a walk with Jeffrey, his jokes and my sweet loving dog Micha. How much more fun could I FIND!

Love, Love...Annie LOVE...

Jannel